Luckily, just when things were becoming unwatchable, Regis Philbin came on and took over. There's something about Regis that allows him to be completely cheesy, but still maintain some professionalism. Just what the Oscars ordered. We at the Shag Carpet give Regis two thumbs up.

There was not a real frontrunner in this year's nominees. Last year Martin Scorsese won several awards, including Best Director for his rather mainstream movie "The Departed." This year "Juno" made the most money of the films nominated, but some would argue that the sleeper hit wasn't considered "mainstream" until the MySpace crowd started to buzz. The other two that have had the most Oscar-talk are "There Will be Blood" and "No Country for Old Men." So here at the Shag Carpet, we'll keep our eyes peeled for those, but hope for a couple surprises along the way too.

And the winners are:  

Achievements in Costume Design - "Elizabeth: The Golden Age" (Alexandra Byrne). Apparently if you are looking to win an Oscar in costume designing, you must be slightly creepy looking and attach yourself to a movie with many big dresses.

Animated Feature Film - "Ratatouille" (Brad Bird) The Shag Carpet salutes you Brad Bird for giving an entertaining and only slightly annoying acceptance speech.

Achievements in Makeup - "La Vie En Rose" (Didier Lavergne and Jan Archibald). Split nominations should get a wee bit more time to talk. It seems like they kept it relatively short but got cut off regardless.

Best Visual Effects - "The Golden Compass" (Michael Fink, Bill Westenhofer, Ben Morris and Trevor Wood) It seemed like "Transformers" was the shoe-in for this award. But it's not surprising that the talking bear won.

Javier Bardem ("No Country for Old Men")

Credit: Matt Petit / ©A.M.P.A.S.

Performance by an actor in a supporting role - Javier Bardem ("No Country for Old Men") This was obviously very much a Hollywood choice. Phillip Seymour Hoffman was Shag Carpet's pick, but there wasn't much lobbying for him or "Charlie Wilson's War." Oh, did we burst your bubble? Yes, Virginia, there is lobbying at the Oscars. In fact millions of dollars go into advertising for the major awards. But, this was the first announced win in our competition between two the heavily buzzed movies. "No Country for Old Men" 1, "There Will Be Blood" 0.

Best live action short film - "Le Mozart des Pickpockets (The Mozart of Pickpockets)" (Philippe Pollet-Villard) It seemed to be a recurring theme that the whole world is represented in the Oscars this year. Pollet-Villard was no exception breaking into French to finish up his acceptance speech. That's okay, the Shag Carpet is always up for a round of "We Are The World."

Best animated short film - "Peter & the Wolf" (Suzie Templeton and Hugh Welchman)

Performance by an actress in a supporting role - Tilda Swinton ("Michael Clayton") Finally the night's first surprise. There was little to no buzz about Swinton getting the win. And the look on her face when her name was announced proved it. Go, Tilda, it's your birthday.

The technical awards, which is one of the most important parts of making movies, always gets a quick 60-second recognition across seven nominations. Thanks, Oscar for looking out for the nerds, I mean "magicians" and "wizards" who created you.

Adapted screenplay - Joel and Ethan Coen ("No Country for Old Men") At Shag Carpet our favorite adapted screenplay and pick for best picture was "The Kite Runner." But because of crazy restrictions, it couldn't be nominated even as a foreign language film. "No Country for Old Men" 2, "There Will Be Blood" 0.

Best sound editing - "The Bourne Ultimatum" (Karen Baker Landers and Per Hallberg)

Best sound mixing - "The Bourne Ultimatum" (Scott Millan, David Parker and Kirk Francis) Jonah Hill and Seth Rogen presented these awards, and Shag Carpet would like to go on record as saying Seth Rogen should've been nominated for best original screenplay for "Superbad" and Jonah Hill for supporting actor. C'mon Hollywood, give the people what they want.

Performance by an actress in a leading role - Marion Cotillard ("La Vie en Rose") This was also quite surprising. But it is keeping with the theme of worldly performers raking in the golden statues. Ellen Page was definitely getting the most buzz, with her "breakthrough" performance as Juno. Is this another step away from the mainstream, or was Cotillard really the better actress?

Achievement in film editing - "The Bourne Ultimatum" (Christopher Rouse) "The Bourne Ultimatum" picked up a lot of post-production awards tonight. But we're wondering, how can a movie be best in editing and sound and not be recognized for anything else? Not even a cinematography nomination, which seemed like the obvious choice. Maybe the shaky cam isn't popular in Hollywood either.

Honorary Oscar Recipient - Robert Boyle. It's sad that some people have to wait until the end of their career to get recognized. Mr. Boyle worked on so many movies that it's a shame he wasn't recognized before now. Ah well, he got to swap a little bit of sweat with Nicole Kidman, so perhaps all is even.

THE BIG WINNERS

From L-R: Daniel Day-Lewis ("There Will Be Blood"), Tilda Swinton ("Michael Clayton"), Marion Cotillard ("La Vie en Rose"), and Javier Bardem ("No Country for Old Men")
Credit: Matt Petit / ©A.M.P.A.S.

Achievement in music written for motion pictures (Original Song) - "Falling Slowly" from "Once." Here's a highlight of the night: Disney had a 3 out of 5 chance to win tonight and STILL fell flat. Hah! Take that, "Enchanted." (No, not YOU Amy Adams. We think YOU'RE great.)

Achievement in music written for motion picture (Original Score) - "Atonement" (Dario Marianelli) "Into the Wild" would've been our choice, had they been eligible. But alas, it wasn't meant to be.

Achievement in cinematography - "There Will Be Blood" (Robert Elswit) Once a year the guys on set who make the little squares with their fingers get their time to shine. "No Country for Old Men," 2, "There Will Be Blood," 1

Best documentary short subject - "Freeheld" (Cynthia Wade and Vanessa Roth) Did anyone else feel a little weird about the soldiers in Iraq announcing a category? Ironically they announced a winner that is about discrimination of same-sex couples. Hmm ... Don't ask, don't tell?

Best documentary feature - "Taxi to the Dark Side" (Alex Gibney and Eva Orner) It's too bad the soldiers didn't announce this category. Of course the military public information offices would've stopped that from happening due to the anti-war nature of the majority of these movies.

Best screenplay - "Juno" (Diablo Cody) Despite being a writer, she's become the newest stripper-turned-Hollywood-it-girl. Here's to not selling out, Diablo.

Performance by an actor in a leading role - Daniel Day Lewis ("There Will Be Blood") Some say Lewis was robbed out of a statue for "Gangs of New York." Here's to finally bringing home another gold. "No Country for Old Men" 2, "There Will Be Blood" 2.

Achievement in directing - Joel and Ethan Coen ("No Country for Old Men") It's nice to see Martin Scorcese finally presenting as an Oscar winner. He's one of those guys who was overlooked for too many years. It's also good for the Coen brothers to get acknowledged for returning to their "Fargo" roots. "No Country for Old Men" 3, "There Will Be Blood " 2

Best motion picture of the year - "No Country for Old Men" (Scott Rudin, Ethan and Joel Coen) No surprises here. Generally "best director" is going to produce the "best picture" not to mention the "best adapted screenplay."

The much hyped "fight" between the two bloody movies, "No Country for Old Men" and "There Will Be Blood" was much hyped for nothing. The final tally was "No Country for Old Men" 4 and "There Will be Blood" 2. We doubt this will stop Paul Thomas Anderson (Or PTA as he's called in Hollywood) from directing films. And perhaps it will nudge the Coen Brothers into doing more serious pictures.

By the end of the ceremony, we at Shag Carpet were on Movie Montage Overload. Laughing celebrities, dead celebrities, singing, dancing, periscopes, binoculars AAAUGGHH! We felt like sitting up in bed and screaming.  Fortunately, Jon Stewart did a decent enough job moving things along and keeping the audience amused. And the only really awkward moment came when Colin Farrel almost fell on the podium. Yikes. Even his good looks and charm couldn't save that uncomfortable silence. Where's Regis when you need him?