There are over 110 million single adults in America today, according to the National Center for Health Statistics. So why is it so hard to find each other?
“Most people need more than an on-line matchup, or even dating,” said Susan Feinstein, a retired Salem principal who’s just launched Perfect Pairings for Conscious Singles, a service that offers coaching, social events and professional matchmaking.
Perfect Pairings’ target is middle-aged singles in Salem, Corvallis, Eugene and Portland. Its focus is on personalized support through coaching.
“Coaching helps people clarify,” said Feinstein, a Licensed Relationship Coach and Singles Relationship Coach through the Relationship Coaching Institute, the oldest and largest service of its kind. “Until you know who you are and what you absolutely must have in a relationship, chances are you’ll settle for less than you deserve.”
Most on-line match-up or dating and event services don’t provide this kind of support, according to Feinstein.
“As singles, we need to take responsibility to become ‘conscious’—to know who we are, what we want, and become clear about our life purpose, requirements and needs,” she said. “Coaching can really help people get there, and that means more successful dating.”
Another challenge for single Boomers? Simply getting back in the mix.
“Many newly single people have no idea how to approach the dating scene,” Feinstein said, “especially if they find themselves suddenly single due to a divorce or loss of a long-term relationship.
In these situations, the old adage practice makes perfect comes into play.
“You have to practice,” she said. “There are so many people who have no idea how to playfully flirt, or even how to talk to people they might like to connect with. So many people have just given up because they are tired of trying to find ‘the one.’”
Once ready, how do you find other singles?
Informal social events are key, according to Feinstein.
“Online dating can be really confusing for many singles, and one obvious solution is social events that let people connect in an informal, no-pressure way,” she said. “Most of us are Boomers, and we’ve worked very hard in our lives. Now, we’re ready to have fun, develop friendships, and not feel like we need to rush into anything. Informal events are perfect for this.”
To this end, Perfect Pairings hosts events, often partnering with local charities and green, sustainable businesses.
For those who want more extensive assistance, Perfect Parings offers professional matchmaking services, which includes personal interviews and matching based on a huge array of information.
The Matchmaking Institute is the only one of its kind.
“As a professional matchmaker, I’m able to use all their tools and resources,” Feinstein said.
Fees are competitive and allow singles to choose which services will help them most: coaching, social events, matchmaking, or a combination of these. For information, visit www.perfectpairingsoregon.com or call 503-569-9709.